THE IRON GIANTS

As far as I am concerned, Transformers is about Sam Witwicky (Shia LaBeouf), a socially clumsy kid transforming himself to be cool. To get that ultimate teen status, he first needs a car. His dad brings him to a used car dealership and comedy ensues. Once Sam gets his yellow Camaro steed, he needs the ultimate car accessory: a girl. Not just any girl. A hot girl (Megan Fox) dressed to realize a horny man’s PG-13 imagination. Sam tries to woo her and comedy ensues. When Sam gets the girl in his room, his parents interrupt… and more comedy ensues. A strange government agent arrests Sam and Mikaela. What happens? Right, comedy ensues. (And oh yeah, there’s some cars that can change into iron giants).

To me, there is a tricky science in watching movies like Transformers. There are special steps to take. I had to lower my expectations, ignore the credibility of the plot (or the plot, for that matter), bask in the glow of the special effects, and repeatedly tell myself to simply relax and enjoy the show. With these actions taken, Transformers is particularly not hard to enjoy. I figured it out. It is all a matter of delusion. I concentrated mostly on the film’s comedy and laughed along with the rowdy crowd. Shia LaBeouf, who gave a strong dramatic work in A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints, is really funny here because he’s not trying to be funny. I also like the presence of dependable actors like Bernie Mac, John Turturro, and Anthony Anderson. When they are on screen, naturally, comedy ensues.

Transformers can be quite the chuckle, except for the final act. I seriously think the movie could have been so much better if it was scaled down. Too many characters. Josh Duhamel and the rest of the soldiers had significant screen time for playing insignificant roles. As for the robots, there is a certain awe when they transform for the first time, but then it becomes redundant. My friend, a fan who has watched the cartoon series, tells me the animated Transformers was more dramatic and the alien robots were so much deeper. Something like that. He kept on talking but I stopped listening. Sorry, as impressive as they are, I like them better in the background. When they dominate the last third of the movie, it felt ridiculously long. If I had to endure a full bladder of urine, it had better be worth it. The battle bots seem to be indestructible; they can battle for eternity. There are countless roads and buildings to destroy. Freaking Michael Bay! But no, I’m not going to complain further. I paid ten bucks and for ten bucks, I am willing to delude and transform myself. I’m not about to lose my spark. I (really) liked this movie.

Grade: B

CAST
Shia LaBeouf, Megan Fox, Josh Duhamel, Rachael Taylor, Tyrese Gibson, Jon Voight, Anthony Anderson, and John Turturro
Screenplay by
John Rogers
Roberto Orci
Alex Kurtzman
Directed by
Micheal Bay
Rated PG-13 for violence, profanity and sexual humor
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